Babe: Three and three quarters
Babeling: Six months

One of the things I have not blogged about, due to my recent atrocious blogging record, is Mr Nobody. This seems incredible, as he has been a member of the family longer than the babeling has. Sometime in the never-ending run-up to the babeling’s birth, the babe asked Gandad who was sitting in the unoccupied chair at the table. Gandad suggested that perhaps Mr Nobody was sitting there, and he has been with us ever since.

He’s a bit of a nuisance, to be honest, because he does all manner of naughty things that the babe would NEVER do but she definitely caught him doing when I was out of the room. He writes on furniture, spills drinks, and pushes her off her chair at supper. He spends a lot of time on the naughty step, sent there mercilessly by the babe. He is a slippery character – sometimes small enough for her to breastfeed but at other times old enough to be caught speeding on the A1. There is however always room for him next to the babe on the buggy board. The only use I have found for him so far is that he is the one person in the whole world who is allowed to rinse shampoo out of her hair or cut her toenails, and I get to help him do it.

All this is a preamble to the following world premiere, because no-one has ever seen what Mr Nobody looks like, until now:

The runic inscription reads: ‘Mr Nobody shouting for Mummy to come and wipe his bottom.’ (It’s a page from one of those doodling books which provides part of the picture, in this case the toilet. The rest is pure babe.)

The babeling is far too practical for such flights of the imagination, especially when there are dishes to be done:

Ganny’s idea of entertaining a baby